the assorter
- 32 years old
- The number of houseplants in the assorter's care ranges from 30 to 40, depending on the time of the year
- Favorite tree: the Baltic pine
- Second favorite tree: the dwarf birch
- Caffeine is really not good for the troll nervous system, but the assorter drinks it anyway because ey's stupid
- Dislikes "men", makeup and skirts, which apparently makes em a butch lesbian (in fact it's just normal behavior for Eurasian forest trolls, but butch lesbians are incredible so the assorter is very honored to be counted as one)
- genderqueer, genderfucker
- an aspiring low-tech nerd and a radical sustainability enthusiast
- ey/em/eir pronouns, used in the same way as "they" without "th" except it's a singular; ey writes a list of facts about emself